Maybe Its because i Just Can't Honestly Tell you what I want...

Its no secret, i am going thru some sort of quarter life crisis. I have always known what i want out of life and have always been a relatively upbeat, happy person. Lately i cant get out of my own way. i have lost interest in everything. I should be happy, i have everything i want, but i still find my self in a funk. I dont even know what it is i want. I think what started this whole crisis is my absolute paranoia about losing my job. If i lose my job, what will i do?? where will i work? and will i ever have a job like this again!? what if i cant find another job? what if i have to work @ walmart? nothing like a $100k degree and working @ walmart. The whole thing stresses me out. And then its like, i want to be happy, but as i sit here, teary eyed, i can only think about how sad i am. Its nothing anyone did to me or said to me. Its just something i can not explain... I am not an emotional person, i can man up with the best of them. I ignore people that bother me, push people away when i think i am about to get hurt, but lately i feel like if someone looks at me the wrong way i will burst into tears. This is not a way for me to live. No matter what i do i cant snap out of it. I have tried going out in the fresh air @ lunch time, walks after dinner, movies, hobbies, outings with the hubby, everything. While i am happy while we are doing these things, i always return to feeling miserable. I really need to snap out of this. I just wish i knew what it is that i honestly want...